She
by VicariouslyHere
Summary: Darcy is a reincarnation of an ex-mortal lover. Loki courts Darcy because she reminds him of "her" but falls in love with her. He struggles to separate her and "her" in his mind. Poetic and angsty.


**Summary**: Based on a prompt given to me on tumblr. Slightly modified because I'm sick and can't think in complete sentences. Darcy is a reincarnation of an ex mortal lover. Loki courts Darcy because she reminds him of "her" but falls in love with her.

* * *

When Darcy laughs, she sounds like _her_. It's a rare melodic ring, but Darcy disagrees. _She_ would never disagree. _She _was loyal. Darcy swears differently. Darcy threatens to tase him when they argue. He never argued with _her._ Loki doesn't mind. Arguing with Darcy is thrilling.

He loves the way Darcy yells. He never heard _her_ yell, not once. Darcy has _her_ face, _her_ body, _her _voice, but not _her _spirit. Loki was disappointed at first. He had traveled so far and for what? He courts Darcy, brings her flowers, takes the woman on walks, but Darcy is disinterested. "Flowers die." She says to him with a shrug of her shoulder. Loki finds the ephemerality beautiful, but Darcy is unimpressed. "Mortals die." He says. He knows this well. Darcy finds the thought depressing and changes the subject.

Darcy complains a lot, Loki thinks. _She_ rarely complained. _She_ was always so rapt with attention and giving to Loki. Loki thought he deserved it. Loki thought he was entitled to _her_ love. It's impossible to think that with Darcy. Darcy reminds him everyday that he's a pain. She is a trickster too, Loki says. When Darcy asks why, he sweeps her up in a kiss. Darcy loves to tease his body. Her fingers are dextrous, her tongue is languid against his skin. _She_ was not as skilled in love making. _She _let Loki take the lead. _She _was shy. Darcy isn't. Darcy struggles for dominance like it's a game, a chase, a thrill. Loki is addicted to the way she smirks when she climbs on top of him. Loki allows her, but lets her believe she is victorious anyways.

Loki loved _her._ "Do you love me?" Darcy asks Loki. Loki can't breathe. His heart feels like a lump in his throat. He loves them both. No, _she_ is long gone. It has been centuries, but he still sees _her_ in Darcy. Darcy is nothing like _her_, but _her_ ghost is everywhere. "Just kidding." Darcy says as she turns away. Loki can tell she isn't joking, but he is relieved. Tonight he doesn't want to argue with her.

He wraps his arms around Darcy. He pushes away the thoughts of _her_. Darcy even smells like _her_. He wonders how he can remember _her_ scent after all these years. "Don't look at me like that." Darcy says, her brows knitting together. Loki is confused. How can she tell? "You're looking through me, not at me. It's lame." She murmurs, lowering her head. Loki wants to look at her. Loki wants to love her.

They have been dating, as Darcy calls it, for quite some time now. It is complicated, but Loki thrives in the chaos. Darcy insists she doesn't do normal anyways, so it works. She is not like _her._ Darcy is not _her._ Loki repeats this mantra in his head, but when she smiles, his heart stops. Her body fits against his perfectly, like a missing puzzle piece. He likes the way she squeezes his hand against her chest. _She_ did that.

Darcy snores when they sleep. _She_ didn't snore. _She _was quiet. Darcy is loud in everything she does. She is bright, enigmatic, life. While _she_ was pastel, Darcy is neon. While _she _was a gentle river, flowing through Loki, Darcy is a thundering waterfall, crashing down on him. He welcomes it. It breaks him apart and puts him back together. He needs that now. He doesn't want to be who he was. He begs her forgiveness. Darcy refuses to give it. She says she never tried to wage war on entire species. Then she laughs. He doesn't hear _her._

Loki is mesmerized by Darcy. It is Darcy. It is not _her_ who captivates him. _She_ once possessed his heart, but no longer. Loki is overjoyed, but afraid to show it. He is a coward of many things. Darcy knows. She sees right through him. Darcy makes fun of him and Loki frowns. She laughs again, wrapping her arms around his neck. He feels her wrap herself around his heart. She presses her lips against his. These are Darcy's lips, Darcy's breasts, Darcy's eyes. These are her fingers moving through his hair. These are her breaths lashing against his neck as he moves against her. This is Darcy's moan. This is Darcy coming undone underneath him.

Loki feels Darcy's love. It is the way she leaves surprise notes for him. It is the way she draws the heart over the i in his name. It is the way she soothes him when he is weak. It is the way she tells him to shut up when he is foolish. It is the way she says I love you. She says it in such faux confidence. She is trying to be brave but she is trembling. She is waiting. Loki sees both apprehension and adoration in her eyes. He asks her if she is afraid. Darcy laughs in his face. She tells him she is fearless. She pauses. She amends her statement after a quiet moment. Darcy is afraid of losing him.

Loki promises he is going nowhere. Loki promises he belongs to her. He belongs to Darcy. It is Darcy. It is always Darcy. "I love you." He says. Those three words set him free. Darcy rolls her eyes at him. "Duh." She says. Loki holds her to him. "It is the absolute truth." He tells her. With her face between his hands, he sees her bright blue eyes stare back at him. Darcy's eyes. He wants her to understand. He would give anything to make her feel his love. She's crying now. Darcy smiles and slaps him against his chest.

Loki is perplexed. He calls her a foolish girl. Darcy is full of nonsensical emotion. Why would she cry? Darcy says she's relieved, but that he is still a jerk. "My jerk." Darcy smirks. He wants to wipe that smirk off her face with his lips. "Do it, you won't." She teases. She shouldn't tease him like that, he says. She is unafraid. She wants his adventure. She wants his best and his worst. He gives himself over to her again, and again.

She is curled against him, naked in bed. He is kissing her shoulder, her neck, her jaw. Darcy shares her every thought with him when they are like this. She babbles on and on, but Loki welcomes it. It soothes him. She says she's never told anyone these things. She says he must be special. "Of course, I am a god." Loki replies, but Darcy rolls her eyes. She disagrees with his reasoning. She always does. Darcy says it is the way he looks at her now. She says it's hard to explain but it is something she knows.

They're falling asleep now, holding one another. Darcy throws her leg over his as she nestles her head against his shoulder. "Thank you." She whispers as she drifts off to sleep. "Hm?" The sound escapes Loki's tired mind.

"For loving me." Darcy says.


End file.
